- Leave my comfort space (AKA my home)
- Meet someone new
I am sitting here racking my brains trying to get the logical side of my mind to realize that this is such a normal common everyday thing that people do. Going out and meeting new people.
So why is it such an ordeal for me?
This is where the 'psychologize yourself' technique works best, as far as I am concerned.
The rational part of me wants to know what could be so terrible about having to go out my front door and meet another human being, whereas the irrational part of me conjures up me meeting some doomed end the moment I close my front door, and images of this person that I will be meeting punching me through the face, mocking me or chasing me down the street.
Even just writing this down, I can see the humour, and I'm even smiling to myself right now, because these fears that are consuming me are so silly.
I've just eaten a big plate of oranges and peaches with some almond nuts, voiced my fears to my husband and just by writing this down and doing the simple technique of psychologizing myself, I can honestly say I feel better.
I'll be back later to report back.....I may feel better.....but I'm still getting those butterflies in my stomach!
I am home. Was it as bad as I thought? No. Did anything happen to me? No. Did the person I meet insult or upset me? No.
Directions....whenever it concerns me, it always boils down to directions. I am completely and utterly 1000% useless when it comes to directions.
You can tell me to go left, and I will go right. You can give me a GPS and I will still get them wrong, and this is the reason why I always seem to pitch up 5-10 minutes late for my appointments. When will I ever learn to leave earlier?
So aside from that bit of stress, my meeting turned out to be much shorter than anticipated. The guy that I met turned out to be a really decent guy and I suppose the walk and fresh air did me good.
I am however glad to be home. What I wanted to prove to not only myself but other social anxiety sufferer's out there is that YOU CAN DO IT!
I didn't cancel my meeting, I went, and it wasn't half as bad as I thought it would be.
I think my rational side knew it all along...... :)
MEL'S HANDY TIP: When you have to go meet someone, whether you are walking, taking public transport or driving, listen to some calming music. I find it helps me even more if I have the ear phones in my ears......and leave a good few minutes to figure out where the place is, so you don't get lost and end up being late!!!!